​​​​​Our thoughts and feelings are forms of energy.  The physical world, including our physical bodies are the most dense, having the lowest frequencies, while our thoughts and feelings have higher frequencies as do “radio waves”, cell phone transmissions, and other physically invisible forms of data transmission.  Happy, joyful and peaceful feelings and thoughts vibrate at a higher frequency than do feelings of sadness, grief, fear, anger, and guilt, etc.  It follows that happy, joyful or peaceful-types of thoughts create better feeling-states which are of a higher vibrational frequency.  How we feel emotionally is nothing less than a barometer of what vibrational state we’re in, which is itself, largely a result of what we’ve been mentally focused on, i.e. what we’ve been thinking about. 

 

Our thoughts and feelings, and their corresponding vibrations get "projected" or transmitted out into the world, just like a radio transmitter, and reflect back like or similar frequencies.  Thus, we actually create our world through those thoughts and feelings.  The better you feel, the higher their frequency.  And the higher their frequency - everything else being equal - the more that positive things will surface in your day, in your thoughts, your feelings, and over time, in how your life is going. 

That is because positive energy attracts positive energy, and negative energy attracts negative energy.  We manifest by our positive vibrational, sincere belief in the present reality of a circumstance or condition.  This is The Law of Attraction (LOA) at work.

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The LOA has been, however, unduly perverted by many who see it as a way to get whatever they want in life simply by hyper-focusing on it. This reflects a misunderstanding and oversimplification of its principles, and also underscores differences between life coaching and psychotherapy as approaches to utilize it.  

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The following are some caveats and potential limitations to the common understanding of The Law of Attraction's principles, and reflect important variables to manifesting meaningful and lasting healing and change:

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One Can't Simply Paint a Happy Emoji Face on a Sad Person​

​A Buddhist metaphor states that one must empty one's rice bowl of old, stale rice in order that fresh, new rice can be added to it.  Similarly, negative energetic states corresponding to anxiety, sadness, anger or guilt and shame need to be purged to make room for positive vibrational states of contentment and joy.  This is so important.  Simply put, one needs to truly shift one's vibration to a higher frequency, not merely go through certain motions, pretending to do so. 

 

While there are times where "putting on a happy face" works, so often it does not.  There's a very real and crucial energetic difference between burying feelings under the rug and really letting them go.  We need to learn to discern the profound difference.  The difference is energetically subtle so we need to be truly vibrationally self-aware, evidenced by so many trying to utilize The Law of Attraction try to convince themselves that they’re "happy" when they are not. 

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Purging Negative Emotions 

As a child and teenager, and indeed throughout much of my life, I had no idea what to do with sadness, anxiety, anger, or shame.  Feelings can be all-consuming and can easily overwhelm.  Left to their own devices, and because they are powerful forms of energy, they can easily lead to maladaptive patterns of behavior.  Because our inclination is to shun uncomfortable feeling states, our unconscious tendency is to sedate them, distract from them, act them out, withdraw from them, create drama with them, and/or internalize them. The problem with all of those mechanisms is that:

what  we resist, persists. 

 

If you're feeling low, or anxious, or sad, try sitting with your feelings and not resisting them, distracting, or acting them out.  Try, also, not to think about your feelings and the story or narrative that goes with them.  I like to say - take a (metaphorical) bath in them.  Immerse yourself in them.  Breathe into them. Feel them, but don't think about them.  This is not initially easy but it can be learned and cultivated.  This is the Eckhart Tolle "Pain-Body" work that I facilitate. 

 

In Zen Buddhism there's a concept called zen mind or beginner's mind.  It is said that the mind should be like an empty rice bowl.  If it's already full, then the Universe can not fill it.  If it's filled with sticky, old rice, there's no room for it to receive fresh new rice.  The old rice needs to be purged or cleaned out first.  In this context, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), a very powerful modality in a field known as energy psychology, guided meditation and breath work are all powerful approaches for Pain-Body therapeutic work, helping us to purge negative emotions.  

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Belief Systems We've "Picked Up"

Our repetitive thought patterns create our unconscious — or invisible — belief systems.  Many of our beliefs stem from childhood and are, themselves, based on the vibrations of others’ belief systems, usually those of our parents and grandparents or early caretakers.  These belief systems, in turn, are continuously projected out into the world and then seemingly validated by our perceptions. Like unscrupulous researchers, conveniently disregarding data inconsistent with their hypotheses, we only see those features of the world which validate our beliefs .  We unconsciously “screen out” data which is inconsistent.  Our corresponding beliefs directly impact the physical shape and neuronal circuitry of our brains. 

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Unless we deliberately do something to change those beliefs, they become more and more entrenched, as does our experience of ourselves and the world.  We have the power to change our beliefs by deliberately guiding our thoughts.  This is LOA work, but it is not overnight.  Beliefs take time to develop because they’re based upon repetition over time.  This is also the basis for Cognitive Therapy, which has shown, over time, to produce physical changes in the brain’s shape and neuronal connections similar to the physical effects on the brain seen following the use of psychotropic medications.​

 

The "Pain-Body", "Karma", Energy Patterns

There are other forces that may be at play when it comes to our psychological and relationship issues, as well as our level of abundance and overall happiness in life. 

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The voice in our head seems to have a life of its own.  Most people feel at the mercy of that voice, almost possessed by thought, by our minds.  Since the mind is conditioned by our past, we are then seemingly forced to relive the past in our thoughts and feelings over and over again. The Eastern term to describe this is Karma. 

 

Eckhart Tolle coined the term Pain-Body to refer to an invisible but very real accumulated negative energy field that we inherit vibrationally from others - most notably, our parents and ancestors - that lives inside of us, affecting our mind and body.  It is an addiction to negativity or judgment or both.  It is very much like a parasite in that it thrives on emotional pain.  Although this seems nonsensical and perhaps even crazy, when we look honestly at thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, we may recognize very irrational patterns in ourselves or others.   

 

Pain-bodies differ from person to person.  One's pain-body can be heavy or light.  Some people's pain-bodies are dormant most of the time, only awakening when triggered.  Others, including those of chronically unhappy people, are active most, if not all of the time.  When the pain-body wakes up from its dormant state, it can manifest in moodiness, anger, irritability or rage, as well as self-pity - and can lead to mental health issues such as depression or anxiety, addictions, a need for drama, and much unhappiness. 

 

This is not metaphor.  I have spoken to psychiatrists rooted in Western medicine, who concur with the existence of such an energy form, one that we simply don't yet have the tools to objectively identify, measure, or validate.

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Many writers, researchers, and academicians have written and spoken about energy patterns stemming from both our own souls’ lessons together with inter-generational contracts of sorts (i.e. the “sins of the father”) resulting from the unresolved conflicts or unlearned lessons of our ancestors.  In her book, "Sacred Contracts", Carolyn Myss, a medical intuitive turned author and lecturer, describes archetypal energy patterns or scripts that we live out.  She reminds us that we are but but co-creators.  Our lives can be compared to our finding ourselves in a boat traveling down a river.  We can choose how to navigate the river - avoiding the rocks, the turbulence, and the shallow spots.  However, the specific river that we’re navigating down is not of our choosing.   

 

Many of our life's circumstances appear to be assigned or given to us:  our parents and their issues and pain-bodies; our physical bodies and genetics; our personalities; our psychic, emotional and physical strengths; as well as our challenges and limitations.  Many religious and spiritual traditions concur with principles that suggest that we must surrender to circumstances in our lives that appear to be out of our control.  The Serenity Prayer invites us to surrender to things that we cannot control.  

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We Don't Know What's Best For Us

A Course in Miracles  ("The Course") is a self-study program of spiritual psychotherapy.  Not unlike many religious and spiritual paths, it teaches that we are divine energetic beings and not our physical bodies.  (Please refer to my article with the same name for more information about ACIM.)  The Course teaches us that we have absolutely no idea what is best for us when we use the ego-based thinking of this world.  Thus, from the perspective of the Course, the only correct application of The Law of Attraction is to seek inner peace.  As it is written in The New Testament, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God .. and all these things shall be added unto you." 

This requires that we release our ego-based thinking and shift instead, over and over again, to a thought system based upon Love, not fear or judgment. 

 

Imagine disconnecting from your Ego-based server, rebooting, and reconnecting to your Spiritual Server or Higher Power.  We may find ourselves "correctly" and "successfully" utilizing the LOA's principles to manifest a very specific job or a particular relationship only to find that an even more abundant and ideal job, relationship, or opportunity was missed.  The Universe had something greater in store for us, but rather than being open, we had allowed our ego mind to yes, manifest --but not for the spiritually highest end.  ​​​​​

 

By seeking only Inner Peace, we are allowing the greatest manifestations to occur by getting out of the way and letting Spirit flow through us in its natural stream, via Universal Intelligence, towards the Highest Good.​​​​​​​